


Obsession & Possession

by ThePigInTheStripedPijamas



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Blackmail, Catholic Guilt, Catholic School, Child Abandonment, Conflict of Interests, Dark Kylo Ren, Homophobia, Hux is Not Nice, Inappropriate Behavior, Internal Conflict, Jealousy, Kylo Ren is Not Nice, Love Confessions, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Non-Consensual Touching, Nude Photos, Obsession, Obsessive Behavior, Online Dating, Power Dynamics, Power Imbalance, Power Play, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sexual Violence, Teacher-Student Relationship, Threats of Violence, Underage Drinking, Underage Sex, Unhealthy Relationships, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2019-03-10 22:11:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13510806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThePigInTheStripedPijamas/pseuds/ThePigInTheStripedPijamas
Summary: Armitage Hux is a teacher and a lonely man. When he decides to use a dating app on a whim, he`s stuck with a mysterious match in the shape of Kylo Ren that will represent much more of a problem than he`d anticipated.  Obsessive fixation, lying, hiding and unhealthy power dynamics turns their connection into a living nightmare that both are unable or unwilling to escape.TL;DR Also known as the day teacher!Hux ends up hooking up with secretly underage!Kylo and then have to face each other at school and decide how to proceed.





	1. Don`t die sad and alone

Friday nights had slowly become unbearable for Armitage. He enters his small apartment with a bang, the door slams against the wall that will definitely leave scuffing. He`s carrying several manila folders and his jacket in one tight-knit ball over his arms. His apartment, of course, is empty and dark.

The week before spring-break always lulled both students and teachers into a false sense of security- it wasn`t  really long enough to relax but it was an absence significant enough to interrupt regular schedule. This week, thus, he´s got too many essays and assignments to comb through, more state-mandated tests to asses and, to add insult to injury, the slow-burning hatred that he´s feeling all too often towards his job and how isolated he feels after the 5-day week of work is over. He neatly sets the pile of documents on the living room table and rests his body heavily on his couch, easing the thick laces off his dress shoes. He looks at his phone screen with heavy eyelids and debates on whether he`ll have a glass of wine or five, flicking the screen open to check his agenda for next week. One wrong swipe gets him to the wrong screen, where the flashy icon of an app he didn`t download beacons to be opened. He`s confused until it dawns on him that it´s that stupid app Phasma downloaded as a joke.

He looks around at the small space of his apartment and how the only noises that can be heard from where he`s sitting are all outside of these four walls. For some reason, his mother`s words start ringing in his head.

_Just don`t die sad and alone._

He opens the app with a defensive attitude. He uploads pictures from his facebook to his profile, the ones he believes are the more representative of himself, inputs his age and leaves his bio completely blank. He goes to the kitchen and pours himself a full glass of 2012 Chardonnay.

Then the swiping starts.

He almost feels dumb for expecting something outside of the trivial requests from the people he`s sifting through. For some reason, he doesn’t stop though. If he enjoys left swiping unattractive strangers a little too much, it is something he`d rather not discuss. There are a few exceptions though; he swipes right on a stunning blonde girl with shallow tastes and red lipstick and a tall brunette man with piercing eyes. No match for either. Then he gets to a certain profile that makes him stall.

Phasma had painted this app as a relatively easy affair. You either wanted to fuck the person on display, or you didn´t, right and left swiping used respectively. This man, however, has his senses confused. He`s  6`2 tall with milky skin and shoulder-length black hair with a large nose and ears, moles covering his face and arms. He`s muscular, as far as he could tell, evidenced by the way muscle peeked from under the black t-shirts and tight black pants he wore in most of his pictures. Armitage didn´t know if he found him attractive. His bio was vague at best and lazy at worst, only his likes and dislikes and what Armitage could only identify as a proper noun of name "Starkiller" at the bottom of the description.

Maybe it`s curiosity or just bad decision making but he swipes right on Kylo Ren.

It`s a match.

Surprisingly enough, Ren is the one to start the conversation.

 _"u look cute,"_ he`d said almost immediately after the match, to which Armitage doesn`t respond _"i know you`re online , u know… "_ he receives only a minute later. Armitage hates how at a loss he feels at this moment, usually being the dominant one within the social interactions he had. Maybe this guy was one of those people too.

Unattractive.

A follow-up message vibrates through Armitage`s phone after 10 minutes of closing the app and letting go of the phone in favor of grading one of the many stacks of papers on his dinner table. He raises an eyebrow at the message, the locked screen only displaying the indicative symbol of a picture being sent.  

When he unlocks his phone, his breath hitches.

The picture is a picture of Ren with his cheeks flushed, mouth delicately open with his tongue peeking out, eyes rolled back into his head. Strands of black hair obscure parts of his face and neck, the moles dusting his skin stark against the dark pink flush. The sight of it is maddeningly erotic. Armitage feels his cock stir at the sight.

 _"Is that you?"_   he asks before he can stop himself. What a stupid question. A second later he receives an answer.

_"now u wanna talk"_

That little shit.

 _"You’ve got my attention now."_ He answers.

_"good."_

After that, Armitage can`t help but to keep typing.

 _"so, what do u do?"_ Ren asks after a while of exchanging meaningless small talk as if either of them cared about their day.

Armitage flirts with the idea of lying; wouldn`t be the first or last time he did it to get people to give him what he wants. Exhaustion prevents him from giving it enough importance for now, though.

 _"I'm a teacher."_ he types.

 _"hs or college?"_ comes the quick reply.

_"High school, to my disgrace."_

_"thats rly cute,"_ Ren replies after a while. It sounds condescending, and Armitage is starting to get irritated _"u look like a teacher"_

He scoffs.

 _"What are you trying to say?"_ he can't help but ask.

" _i  have strong opinions regarding teachers,"_

_"Really, now?"_

_"i could tell you, if you`d like"_

_"I`m not in a hurry."_

_"i have a theory,"_ Ren begins _"that all teachers belong into one of 3 groups,"_

He stops.

 _"Go on…"_ Armitage prompts.

_"there`s the person that wholeheartedly believes that they can make a change in society through teaching_

_u know, the feel good teacher that lets  you get away with things others normally wouldn´t, that`s the first type_

_then there`s the frustrated college grad that can`t find upwards mobility or a job to begin with, so they dedicate themselves to teaching while resenting their lives,"_

Armitage starts feeling rage boiling inside of him.

_"and then there`s the third type of teacher, the most fun to fuck with, in my opinion_

_they enjoy being above their students, the power imbalance, how much they get to decide about their students, good or bad_

_sometimes they actively try to boycott those who are better than them, more intelligent or talented than themselves_

_other times they are predators that prey on their students in inappropriate ways. they usually try to hide it, very well at that. but i always know one when i see one."_

Armitage leaves his phone on the coffee table to take a shower. After five minutes, it vibrates without him being there to see.

_"i think it`ll be fun to discover which type are u"_

XXX


	2. Spring Break Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo and Armitage exchange more pictures. They decide to meet up.

Everything Kylo Ren wrote was tinged with insolence. Armitage didn´t know why, or even how, but it always seemed like he was mocking him with his words. It didn`t help that, whenever Armitage was losing interest, he`d send more pictures in different states of undress that would pull the attention back to their conversation. His favorite photo was a half-body selfie where he was laying on his bed with no top on, the vast expanse of his flushed, speckled chest on full display. He had a thick, black leather collar around his neck and disheveled hair, as if he´d just stopped masturbating to take that picture for him.

Armitage had come at least twice that weekend looking at that picture.

The first day of spring break vacation meant absolutely nothing to Armitage beyond the massive piles of paper in his living space. He wakes up  that Monday at 6am as usual, does his morning routine of showering with cold water and brewing hot coffee almost like he`s forgotten there`s no school that day. As he sits in the living room in his casual clothes and thick glasses with last week`s assignments, he feels his phone vibrate next to him. He has to grade these papers, so he shouldn`t really be distracted with Ren at least until noon. He estimated that he could get 25% of the work done for the week if he just started early Monday morning.

The phone vibrates again.

At this point, he knows the more he ignores the incoming messages, the more likely he´s to receive a lewd picture, which makes Armitage think that Ren is using pavlovian conditioning to get him to talk to him. The best ones always come unannounced during random conversations though.

_"youre up early. theres no school today though, right?"_

_"No."_ He answers dismissively as he twiddles the pen in his hand.

_"what got in your ass?"_

Incredibly, Ren doesn`t press the matter further, which has Armitage frowning 40 minutes later.

" _I`m busy."_  is the closest thing to an explanation or an apology he can muster at the moment. Ren doesn`t respond, which is unusual, and Armitage tries not to think about it as much as he is. He`s halfway done with this packet of papers when his phone vibrates again.

_"we should fuck."_

Almost everything that comes from Kylo Ren could be considered a non sequitur. Still, Armitage can feel the telltale heat of arousal in the tip of his ears.

 _"You`re always thinking about sex, aren´t you?"_ he  writes back, manila folder next to him.

 _"only when i talk to you"_ he receives. The heat from his ears starts spreading to his neck and chest, his cock giving an interested twitch.

 _"Show me."_  

Armitage feels himself hardening at the suspense, knows that Kylo is probably constructing the perfect picture to get him aroused. When the image comes though, it`s much better than what he could`ve anticipated.

Kylo is kneeling in front of a full-length mirror, wearing nothing but ruffled powder pink lingerie. The flimsy fabric of the top barely covers each nipple respectively, probably outstretched due to the expanse of his back, the transparent bottom part barely straining over his hard cock. The black leather collar encompasses his neck, one of his long fingers pulling on the collar ring. The ensemble lets Armitage appreciate the dusting of moles all over his body, how pale and unmarred his skin looks, how the dark flush manifests down to his pretty nipples.

_"would u fuck me like this?"_

Armitage gives a labored breath he didn`t know he was holding.

 _"Until there were bruises on your thighs."_ he replies with one hand, the other busy undoing the button of his pants. When he grips the base of his cock he lets out a grunt.

 _"do u touch yourself with my pictures?"_  

Armitage wrestles the pants off his hips to have more mobility, when he reads the message he almost laughs.

 _"I do, actually."_ he responds. His grip tightens as he starts pumping himself slowly.

_"do my pictures make you cum, Mr.Hux?"_

When Armitage comes, he`s fantasizing about spilling all over Kylo Ren`s breasts.

xxx

They arranged their meeting at the local Starbucks, Tuesday 4pm. Although he hated to admit it, Armitage felt the acidity of anxiousness coat his insides as the clock ticked towards the designated time. It felt strange to meet at a Starbucks of all places, given the nature of their acquaintanceship, but another part of Armitage dawned on the conclusion that it was the most convenient location for both of them.

At 4pm sharp, Armitage is sitting on a two person table  with a dark roasted Americano in one hand and his phone in the other.

 _"I'm here."_ he types, sipping lightly on his coffee.  He doesn`t expect or get a response, of course, most likely because Kylo is late and for some reason it doesn`t surprise him at all.

It`s 4:38 when Armitage sees Kylo for the first time. He `s looking around the coffee shop and when he finally sees Armitage, against all odds, he smiles. He`s wearing a tight black shirt and pants, his long hair swept back in a probable attempt to groom it.

Armitage knew he was tall, but damn him if he doesn`t look imposing in person as he strides towards his table. He stands up to give him his hand.

"It`s  nice to finally meet you, Mr.Hux." he says, his voice a deep rumble that surprises Armitage.

"You should just call me Armitage." He answers, taking his seat and beckoning Kylo to sit across him.

"You`re much taller than what I anticipated," Kylo says with a sly grin that slightly sours Armitage`s mood. It would seem that insolence permeated his words in person as much, if not more, as they did through their written interactions. "Usually people lie to seem taller, more attractive."

"Do they, now?" Armitage hums. He decides to change the subject "I haven`t seen you around here, it`s not that big of a town ."

Kylo chuckles a little bit "Yeah, I've just moved in."

"Work related?"

"Something like that."

It`s strange, seeing each other in person. Armitage tries to dissect the man in front of him with sharp glances, notices the wicked gleam in his deep brown eyes and doesn`t know what to do with it. They talk a while about coffee, how Kylo would rather have a sugary frappe than what Armitage is drinking. After 15 minutes of exhausting meaningless topics, Kylo stays silent for a while. He leans towards Armitage.

"Do you wanna go somewhere else?" he whispers, pulling away to examine Armitage`s face. He gives a small grin when he notices the tip of his ears turning red. "It would seem that we`re both thinking of other things."

Armitage scoffs, running a hand through his perfectly styled hair.

"You seem awfully sure of yourself." He says, not making any attempt to move.

"You`re telling me you wouldn’t like to put your cock in my mouth?"

" _Christ,_ " Armitage breathes. He can feel the heat starting to redden his skin, how blood is starting to flow places they shouldn’t. He still doesn`t move. "You shouldn`t be saying that kind of thing in public, you know. Lest somebody hear you and get upset."

"I don`t give a shit," Kylo answers, sneaking his hand under the table to rest it on Armitage`s thigh. He could feel how Armitage´s pants were begining to strain "Let`s go to your place."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the cool messages! I will be updating soon!


	3. Spring Break Part 2

For some godforsaken reason, Armitage listens to Kylo and they get in the car. The drive home has them both prickling with anticipation. He steals glances through the review mirror, to which Kylo is oblivious, looking through the window. He looks less confident than what he did back at the coffee shop, and Armitage`s mind starts to wander, the barrage of semi-nude images currently on his phone gallery suddenly popping in his mind`s eye as he`s sitting next to him.

"What are you looking at?" Kylo says suddenly, to which Armitage responds by looking at the road. It`s a short 10 minute drive until they get to his apartment. Armitage opens the door slowly and steps inside.

"Would you like some wine?" he says while Kylo sits on the couch.

"Sure."

Armitage arrives with two full glasses of red wine and hands one to Kylo`s outstretched hand. "Nice apartment." He comments softly, looking at the glass of wine in his hand and taking a big swig. Armitage takes a seat next to him on the couch.

There`s silence in the living room as always,  a silence that both are aware of and makes them anxious. It takes Kylo two more gulps to finish his glass and sets it on the coffee table in front of them, fingers slightly shaky as he looks at Armitage. He  sets his half-full glass on the table too, heart beat thrumming in his ears. He starts running his hand through Kylo`s  neck.

"Your skin is so soft…" he murmurs almost inadvertently, combing his hand through Kylo`s thick black hair, thumb caressing the high planes of his cheeks while Kylo keens into the touch. Slowly, his hand starts sneaking towards Armitage´s thigh, moving upwards so gently you`d think he was shy about it. Armitage`s eyes go slightly hooded, still locked onto Kylo`s face, examining every little detail. When his hand reaches the uppermost part of  his thigh, Armitage places his hand over Kylo`s, guiding it towards his hardening cock.

Kylo lets out a stuttering breath, licking his lips briefly at the heat of Armitage`s hand and crotch over and under his palm. He starts engulfing the clothed bulge, relishing in the almost undetectable sigh that leaves Armitage`s throat. He decides to kiss the side of his neck.

"I wanna suck you off…" he whispers softly against the sensitive skin of his neck, hair covering his eyes. "May I?" Armitage pulls away slightly from his scalding lips to look at him in the eyes.

"Take of your shirt," Armitage demands and Kylo complies, clumsily stripping himself. When he`s done, Armitage grabs him by the shoulders "Now get on your knees."

If Kylo has a problem with how controlling Armitage sounds, he doesn`t show it. Instead, he kneels obediently between the other man`s outstretched thighs. He nuzzles his face towards Armitage´s crotch, nudging his erection with his nose.

"You said you wanted to suck me off, right?" Armitage breathes, looking at Kylo`s clouded eyes "What are you waiting for?"

Kylo unbuttons the dress pants and tugs, releasing him from the constricted heat. There`s already a wet spot in Armitage`s boxer briefs, where Kylo puts his mouth over the clothed head before tugging them off completely. He looks up at Armitage`s reddened face before admiring his length and girth with heavy eyes, slowly licking a thick stripe from the base to the tip.  

"So beautiful…" he murmurs quietly.

Kylo takes his time, hungrily sucking on the head of his cock before slowly sinking in, taking the length in his mouth while Armitage starts fisting his hair. He`s hard himself, making Armitage all the more aroused when he starts palming his cock over his jeans. Kylo starts bobbing his head at a steady pace, aided by the large pale hand guiding him down with each stroke.

"Fuck, I`m close," Armitage says suddenly, strained, removing himself from Kylo`s mouth with a wet pop that makes Kylo whimper. He tugs the fistful of hair in his hands and growls "Take off your pants and straddle me."

Kylo does as he´s told, hissing as the cold air hits his thick erection, spreading his legs over Armitage`s own and relishing on the touch of skin against skin. Armitage can see the blushed skin and freckles that cover Kylo`s body, the little pink nipples he`d touched himself to the last couple of days. It`s maddeningly erotic.

Armitage takes both of their dicks into his hand, Kylo following with his own as they pump each other slowly with the wetness of remnant saliva.

"Fuck, Mr.Hux, your hands are so big…"  Kylo starts to babble, eyebrows knitted "I wish you would spank me with them, finger me with them…"

Armitage bites the speckled juncture of his shoulder and neck to stifle a moan.

"I`m going to cum, I`m gonna cum!" Kylo blurts out with a drawn out moan. Hot spurts of slick starts covering both of their hands. Armitage bites down harder as he follows suit and  comes with a shudder.

They pant against each other, unable to move. After a full minute of labored breaths, Kylo rolls over to the other side of the couch. Without saying a word, Armitage stands up and takes off his buttoned shirt, crumpling into a ball and tossing it into a dirty laundry basket. Kylo can hear him shuffling, distantly, consumed by the strength of his post orgasmic glow. When Armitage re-appears, he`s fully clothed as he throws Kylo a damp towel. "Here. Clean yourself."

After he`s finished mopping up the cum on his stomach, Kylo begins dressing up. Armitage is standing in front of the kitchen sink, washing some miscellaneous utensils as a pretext to avoid conversation. To his surprise, Kylo starts laughing. He turns around to look at the tall man briefly.

" Same time tomorrow?" Kylo suggests with a fucked-out smile that looks vulgar and promising.

Armitage should know better.

"Sure."

 


	4. Spring Break Part 3

Armitage was turning 30 next year, although people always told him he looked much younger. He wasn`t, by any stretch of the imagination, an _old_ person. According to his profile, Kylo was only 19 years of age. Armitage hadn`t even noticed until he`d asked him, astounded at the news even as understanding flooded his features. 

 

"Are you too old to play with me, Mr.Hux?" Kylo mocked him while holding him from behind in the shower, the soft press of his erection against Armitage`s ass. "Just one more, I´ll leave you alone after that."            

 

"You said that four hours ago, you greedy creature," He complains halfheartedly, feeling goosebump raise where Kylo`s lips meet his shoulder. It´s 11pm already, they’ve been at it since 4pm. Needless to say, Armitage is exhausted. " How do you have the energy?"

 

Kylo chuckles lightly, nimble fingers wondering the naked expanse of Armitage`s body.

 

"You turn me on." He says simply "You get so rough when you`re about to come, I bet I`ll be all bruised tomorrow morning."

 

The words have the desired effect. Armitage inhales a ragged breath and his dick twitches weakly. He can see Kylo`s slim fingers starting to engulf his waist, almost like he`s measuring him in an odd, possessive way, only to press himself closer to Armitage`s back.

 

"You should be thankful you have someone as willing as me." He whispers into Armitage`s neck, a shiver racking his body.

 

It`s already Friday night and they`ve seen each other religiously since Monday afternoon, as scheduled. Kylo kept wanting more and more and Armitage would`ve felt defenseless if only that- dependant? - behavior didn`t feed his ego as much as it did. Kylo didn’t seem to want love or romance, he had made it very clear.

 

Armitage was thankful for that.

  
He`d begun to notice the way Kylo would keen into his touch, how he would devour all praise Armitage threw his way.  Armitage wasn`t sure if he`d heard the words _daddy_ escape Kylo`s throat once or twice, or pleasure muddled up the words  as they left Kylo`s pretty lips and went through Armitage`s eardrums.

 

Something within Armitage feel almost juvenile when they were together like this; Kylo Ren a cyclone of testosterone and stamina he couldn`t possibly catch up to but tried to anyway. He`d had more sex in one week than he`d had in months, and he didn`t want to think how short-lived this was doomed to be.

 

"I could suck you off." Kylo bargains, shifting the attention to himself, always to himself, voice barely a whisper above the constant spray of water.

 

Armitage turns around.

 

xxx

 

As far as Armitage is concerned, the general rule of procedure regarding hookups had a golden premise that couldn`t- shouldn`t - be broken at any given time.

 

No sleeping in.

 

Imagine his surprise as he wakes up in his room to a semi clothed, frantic Kylo Ren, picking the pieces of undress from the ground.

 

"What time is it?" Armitage asks immediately, then sees the rays of sunlight under his blackout curtains with wide eyes "Did I fall asleep?"

  
What a stupid question.

 

Kylo doesn`t answer, now in all fours looking underneath the bed for the things he can`t find laying around the bedroom "I have to go now or else I`m fucked." He says absently.

 

Armitage is annoyed and confused. He puts on a t-shirt and some slacks, leaving behind the manic Kylo alone in favor of making some coffee. When he checks the time on his phone, it`s 6:44am. Later than usual but still very early. As he stands next to his steaming French press coffeemaker, he starts rolling his neck; He felt completely run down, the exhaustion from yesterday evident in the soreness of his back and leg muscles. Some part of him, the bigger part, felt satisfaction.

 

Kylo stumbles out of Armitage`s room with his t-shirt in his hand.

 

"I gotta run," he says, putting it on hastily. Armitage be damned, but Kylo looked almost _cute_  with his hair disheveled and eyes wide "I`ll see you later?"

 

"Sure." Armitage replies, pouring the black brew into a pristine white mug.

 

Kylo smiles, albeit somewhat anxiously, as he hurries out the door.

 

Armitage sits down on the dinner table, the telltale signs of early morning permeating his apartment while he drinks his coffee. His mind begins to wander, remembering how Kylo had given him head so enthusiastically that night. Armitage wouldn’t dare to admit it,  but he`d fallen asleep almost immediately after he came, completely drained. Kylo had probably tested his luck by lying beside him as he slept, drawing the short stick by falling asleep himself. He wasn`t as uncomfortable as he was when his hookups stayed the night, inadvertently or not, which was strange. It was probably for the best that he`d scrammed so early in the morning.  

 

Saturday is grocery shopping day. Armitage had managed to finish grading papers, had already done his laundry and, well, didn`t really feel the need to go out for a jog. He makes the bed, takes a long shower, starts reading a book he hadn`t had the time to read, all to kill time until the supermarket opens.

 

He`s in the parking lot of the nearest Target 11am sharp, thankful that they`ve opened on time for once as he removes a cart from the designated area. Doing domestic activities usually made Armitage`s mind stray to places he`d rather not. It`s unavoidable, seeing loving couples and happy families, moving portraits of things he`s never had but somehow misses. Shopping early in the morning or late at night usually diminished the chances of finding any of that.

 

His shopping list isn`t long or complex. He buys lots of fresh fruit and vegetables to cook his meals, buys a six-pack of discount beer and a two bottles of fine wine for the school week. It`s almost like he`s going through the motions, prodding produce to determine freshness and mentally adding up the prices of the things in his cart.  


"Armitage?" he hears suddenly, the recognizable voice making him turn with a small smile. So strange to find her here.

 

"Headmistress Organa, what a pleasant surprise." He answers curtly, offering his hand as a greeting.

 

"Always so uptight, Armitage. For the hundredth time: You can call me Leia outside school." He gives him a smile and an affectionate pat on the shoulder.  
  
"Old habits die hard," he answers before looking over her shoulder, pointing a finger towards the boxes of Lucky Charms in her cart.  "Now, call me perceptive, but I remember you mentioned once that you were diabetic…"

 

Leia knits her brows in confusion until she sees what he means "Ah…yes," she lets out a little chuckle "You were always the observant one. You remember Ben?"

 

"Yes, of course."

 

"He`s living with me now." She offers simply.

  
"Oh, that`s good to hear," Armitage doesn`t want to press, but he does anyway "Whatever happened to your brother?"

 

 

"It`s complicated stuff, I don`t want to bore you with it," Her expression doesn`t give much away, a defining characteristic of hers that made teachers respect her and students fear her. She looks at her watch "Oh damn, it`s midday already. I have to go make lunch, you know just how _much_ teens eat, its ridiculous," she pats him on his shoulder again before she leaves.

 

"See you on Monday!"


	5. The Weight of Realization

Armitage is so tired than when Kylo`s message arrives, he`s pretty sure God himself had answered his prayers.

 

" _cant come today,"_ The message reads " _id forgotten about some stuff i need to get done_

_probably wont be free until monday or tuesday"_

So this is how it ends.

_"You talk as if I weren`t going to be busy myself."_ He contests, trying to procrastinate the inevitable dissolution of their short but sweet encounter.

_"and you talk as if you werent completely exhausted from what i did to you last night, old man"_

 

So insolent.

 

 _"Somebody ought to discipline you"_ he answers coldly.

 

The answers comes five minutes later.

 

_"cant wait"_

It`s the last message they share.  

 

xxx

xxx

xxx

 

Armitage starts reconsidering his exercise routine more in depth when Monday comes around and his neck is still stiff. Waking up Monday morning always seems to magnify every minor grievance, from the slight strained pull behind Armitage`s tired eyes or how cold the tips of his toes are.

 

His apartment was close enough to walk to work. Still, given the sheer amount of paper he`s got to hand out today, he drives his way there. He parks his car in the designated spot, taking a sip of coffee form his travel mug as he mentally checks the itinerary for today. An unexpected knock on his window makes him startle.

 

"You`re gonna be late." He hears Phasma say through the glass. Armitage lowers the window with a frown.

 

"I`m never late, you know that."

 

"You`d think a Lit major would understand sarcasm when directed at him," she quips, looking at the mountain of manila folders on the passenger's seat."Need any help with those?"

 

"I`m fine." He answers, stepping out of the car to haul the documents into his arms. They start walking to the teacher`s room. "Every year there`s more state mandated tests, it`s absurd."

 

"Tell me about it. Vacations don`t mean shit with so many deadlines in sight."

 

Armitage raises an eyebrow "Where are your tests anyway?" 

 

She actually laughs "I left them at home."

 

Phasma had a way of making things work without actually being particularly organized or efficient. He couldn`t  understand how she managed to do her job and do it well. As far as he`s concerned though, the only thing that mattered was her impeccable results. She was probably one of the best teachers here.

 

Once they`re in the teacher`s room,  Phasma chats up whatever poor soul that`s willing to listen. Armitage wasn`t particularly inclined to socializing with the other teachers and he knew they weren`t either; he`d met most of them when he was a student here himself. It was unnecessary to remark that he hadn`t left the best impression on past teachers and classmates.

 

When the 8am bell rang, Armitage was already sitting in his homeroom. He surveyed his students, most of them already inside and acutely aware of their teacher`s almost compulsive need for punctuality. He clears his throat loudly at 5 past 8, a clear signal for everyone to take their seats. He´s halfway through the roll call when there`s a knock of the door.

 

"Excuse me," he says softly to the class as he walks towards the door and opens it "Oh, Headmistress Organa I-"

 

She stands in front of him, one hand on her trusty clipboard and one arm surrounding…

 

 _Kylo_?

 

His confusion is evident.

 

"Armitage, dear. This is Ben, my son," she says. Armitage can feel the blood start draining from his face, eyes darting from Kylo`s uneasy expression to Leia´s tired one. "A few last-minute arrangements had to be made, but he`ll be in your class for the remainder of the year."

 

A full 10 seconds elapse before Armitage can make rhyme or reason of what`s happening before him.

 

"You should introduce him to the class." he says faintly, Leia giving him a concerned once over as the three of them enter the classroom.

 

Armitage takes his seat and he feels his eardrums are filled with cotton balls. What was happening right now, why was _he_ here? Leia`s prompting cough almost snaps him from his trance "Everybody welcome-" _Kylo_? _Ben_? He clears his dry throat. "Your new classmate."

 

The class intones their welcome in as monotone a voice as possible. Armitage can`t keep his eyes off _him_ the whole time, burning holes into the back of his head with the intensity of his stare. He makes the question out loud before he can stop himself "How old are you?"

 

Kylo- _Ben_ , oh God- looks at his mother briefly, somewhat anxiously, then at Armitage before shielding himself with his long black hair.

 

"I`m 17."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it`s a short one, but I felt like it had to end there. I will be updating today most likely, at most tomorrow. Thank you for your lovely comments!


	6. Shock + Denial

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! Next chapter it`s on its way today but probably tomorrow. Thank you for the kudos, bookmarks and encouraging messages, I appreciate them so much! I´m so glad people are enjoying the story so far. As always, keep tuned because I`ll be updating soon!

If Armitage could pick one defining characteristic to describe himself, it`d have to be his composure. Years of emotional and physical abuse during his formative years had allowed him to appropriately confront and circumvent dangerous situations. Armitage could feel his life disintegrating as realization crashed on him like a sledgehammer. His eyes, briefly, betrayed the depth of his horror. His face remained mostly impassive.

 

It was almost surreal, what was happening right now. Armitage felt himself _this_ close to disassociating, trying to keep his breathing nice and even while he grappled to understand the situation he was in and how to proceed. Registration dragged on, as per usual, 20 minutes after roll call. He averted his eyes from his students with the excuse of reading his book, his mouth a thin tight line on his face. If he wasn’t so standoffish towards his pupils every Monday morning it could`ve raised suspicions.

 

Seventeen years old.

 

It couldn`t be, right? This had to be a joke, one in very poor taste. The initial stages of denial had him think a thousand ways this could`ve been staged, by whom and why.  He didn`t _look_ underage, whatever the hell that meant; he looked older than him for crying out loud.

 

He felt the intrusive compulsion to look at him, almost to make sure he was real, that he was sitting not five meters away from him. Against his better judgment, he steals a glance. He feels an icy pinprick spear through his spine when their eyes meet, a barrage of lewd, _inappropriate_ , images assaulting his brain until he thinks he`s about to vomit.

 

For the second time since he got hired, Armitage takes a sick leave.

 

xxx

 

By 6pm, Armitage is drunk enough to think about the matter without a muted panic bubbling in his stomach. He surveys his living room, unusually messy with empty beer cans everywhere and a half-full bottle of wine on the coffee table. The first thing he`d done once he`d left the school was deleting the goddamn app that had allowed for this situation to happen. He`d cursed the moon and stars, but mostly himself, for not obeying the part of his brain that had told him at the time that using the app was a dumb idea. Even his mother`s words, in context, seem stupid and irrelevant.

 

Phasma called him twice once classes had ended, calls he`d hung up immediately. He knows they`re not friends, not really, but something told him she was going to come around to ask if he needed a substitute for the remainder of the week or something along those lines. If he was being honest, Armitage didn`t even want to think about Phasma. He somewhat blamed her for invading his privacy and introducing him to the root of his problems by downloading things that he hadn`t wanted or needed. In retrospective, he felt petty but vindicated.

 

When he goes to the bathroom to wash his face, he sees the physical effects of the alcohol he`s been drinking; he notices the redness in the high planes of his cheeks, his ears, his nose. His hair is uncharacteristically disheveled, the five o'clock shadow prickling his skin in an almost undetectable manner. Just when he starts cursing his Irish blood, there`s a knock on the door. He took a few seconds to breathe, unsure of how much restraint he`d be willing to have if Phasma started asking questions he didn`t want to answer. He didn`t trust himself fully while drunk.

 

When he opens that door, he has to blink twice to verify that what he`s seeing is not a dream.

 

Was this idiot really at his door right now?

 

"Before you close the door I need-"

 

"What do you think you`re doing?" he interjects, anger slowly spreading to his neck, his face.

 

"I just want-"

  
"No!" he yells. He immediately looks at both sides of the hallway, voice decrescendo to a seething whisper "Are you insane? Do you know how much trouble I`d be in if anybody saw you here?"

 

"Nobody will see-"

 

"You don`t know that!"

 

If his heart is starting to beat a mile a minute, he tries not to think about it.

 

"What the hell is your problem?" Kylo has the _gall_ to ask, crossing his arms over his chest like _his_ ass was on the line "Are you really that paranoid?"

 

"My God,  are you conceited," Armitage says, awestruck at the audacity of this kid. He blows air out of his nostrils, trying to calm himself before doing something he may regret later "What the hell do you want from me?"

 

"Just let me set things straight, then I`ll leave," Kylo`s expression softens after that, if only marginally. It`s too late to realize this sensitivity made him look much younger than what he would`ve guessed initially "I could just do it right here if you don’t want me inside."

 

Armitage pinches the bridge of his nose with a heavy sigh. "Don’t stand there like an idiot," he looks around them once again "Get inside, Christ."

 

Kylo steps in, the awkwardness in his long-legged steps now an evident tell-tale sign of his age. They seat across from each other, Armitage settling in his couch while Kylo shuffles into an armchair that doesn`t fit his size. The silence stretching between them almost makes Armitage believe once again that maybe this isn`t really happening.

 

"Do you hate me?" Kylo asks suddenly, a soft look in his eyes that angers Armitage so much he`d slap him if they were slightly closer.

 

He bypasses the question entirely. "We need to get some things out of the way right now. Give me your phone."

 

Kylo`s eyebrows twist with confusion. "I don`t have it with me," he answers slowly "I left it at home charging."

 

"Are you kidding me right now? God, at least tell me you`re smart enough to have deleted that app…" he pleads, eyes piercing Kylo`s in a way that makes him almost flinch.

 

"I didn`t think- I just thought that-"  
  
"Oh my god," Armitage runs his hands through his hair "You`re an idiot. I can`t believe this."

 

"It`s no big deal, I`ll just delete it when I get home-" Kylo began rambling.

 

"Kylo. Do you have any idea," Armitage interrupts, voice suddenly an unsettling steady stream that makes Kylo`s skin crawl " _Any_ idea of what happens if this…thing gets out? If somebody finds out?"

 

Kylo has an idea, just not one he`s willing to voice right now.

 

"My life is over. Do you know what you`ve made me?" Armitage is so calm it`s starting to scare Kylo, the way he`s inching forward menacing and alarming "You’ve made me a sexual predator, Kylo. Forgive me if I`m not as _chill_ with it as you`d like. As things stand, my whole life depends on two things; your ability to keep your mouth shut and the complete obliteration of all evidence. And I only trust the later."

 

For all his bravado, Kylo`s out of his depth and Armitage knows it. He keeps prodding.

 

"Listen carefully to what we`re going to do. First of all, we _never_ talk about this. We don`t let anybody know," He presses his palms together, pointing at Kylo with them "Do you understand?"

 

"Yes..."

 

"Secondly, tomorrow morning you have English Literature with me," it`s a statement, not a question "There will be a pop quiz, spring break revision, it doesn`t matter. I`ll ask everybody to put their phones on my desk until the end of the test, you give me yours _unlocked_ and I`ll make sure our conversation is completely erased. Do you understand?"

 

He can almost see the cogs turning inside Kylo`s head, but his answer is clear "Yes."

  
"Good," He concludes "Now, _Ben_. You should really get out of my apartment."

 


	7. Anger + Bargaining

Tuesday morning comes and Armitage is so tense he feels like he could burst at any moment. He watched as his classroom filled up slowly but surely, the buzz of conversation starting to fill the air with a sense of normality that Armitage was secretly glad for.  When _Ben Solo_ enters his classroom, his demeanor doesn`t betray anxiousness like it did the day previous. He, instead, takes a seat on the second row of the classroom and stares at him like he wants to say something. Armitage notices the leather collar around his neck.

 

After that, he proceeds as usual. Registration ends but the students remain on their seats chatting with each other, taking out their notebooks.

  
Armitage clears his throat loudly as he stands, a stack of papers in his arms "Good morning everyone," he begins, walking to the front "I`m sorry for yesterday - these couple of days have been a little… difficult due to personal matters."

 

Ben looks at him with big, attentive eyes.

 

"In any case, as you all know, SATs are but a month away for you seniors. I`ve gone through your spring break tests and essays," he gestures at his desk with his nose "Unfortunately, I believe most of you are lacking regarding the course. That being said, I`ve prepared this pop quiz to test you today."

 

The collective groaning would`ve made him smile if he didn`t feel his chest so tight. He hated this.

 

"As per usual, I`ll go through each of your desks and request you hand over your phones," he continues "Then I`ll give out the quiz."

 

He goes by each desk, decommissioning the cell phones one by one until he gets to Kylo`s seat.

 

"Cellphone, please." He repeats with his hand outstretched.

 

Kylo looks at him with wide, almost innocent eyes "Oh, I don`t have one."

 

Armitage does a double take "Excuse me?"

 

"Mine broke a few days before moving in, haven't had the chance to get it fixed yet," He argues, looks at him right in the eyes with a twisted gleam Armitage can`t fully understand "All the better for you, right?"

 

Of course Armitage knows he`s lying. Still, the excuse is believable enough that pressing the matter in front of 30 other students could become problematic. When Armitage takes his seat, Kylo is looking at him with a sleazy smile so disrespectful it's making his blood boil.

 

"You may begin." He grates through gritted teeth.

 

xxx

 

No one, no matter the circumstance, could be furious for an extended amount of time. This didn`t mean that Armitage`s mood during the day was anything other than extremely sour, maybe even a bit anxious. When the last bell of the school day rings, Armitage can feel the strained pull of a headache behind his eyes, not painful enough to consume him completely but incessant in its presence.

 

He hated when things didn`t go according to plan.

 

As his classroom emptied sluggishly, his mind was going overboard machining scenarios, courses of action, appropriate responses. It was his usual reaction mechanism to danger, the pending threat of discovery looming his every thought and alternative. The deeper he dug, the more embedded his rage became.

 

He`s only pulled from this stagnancy when he hears a deep coughing noise, Kylo leaning on the door frame with his arms crossed.

 

"Mr.Hux," he says out loud, the remaining students lazily shouldering past him to their freedom "Could we have a word?"

 

Armitage looks around at the almost empty classroom, jaw clenched tightly.

 

"Sure." He allows.

 

The last girls scuttle past Kylo`s broad frame with caution, intimidated or amused, Armitage can`t tell. He walks towards the door and Kylo makes way as he sticks his head out and looks around. The hallways are, fortunately, empty.

 

Good.

 

He calmly closes the door with a click and turns around, his repressed fury suddenly bubbling to the surface of his face and skin. He suddenly clamps his hand tightly around Kylo`s right bicep.

 

" _Give me your phone,"_ he seethes, strengthening his grip unwittingly, bringing them dangerously close " _Now._ "

 

"Fuck you," Kylo spits, "I don’t owe you shit."

 

Something snaps inside of Armitage.

 

He shoves Kylo against the nearest wall, knocks the air out of his lungs. Before he has time to protest, Armitage closes his hands around his windpipe, fingers closing on the lather that covers his neck "You _conceited brat_ , what do you take me for-"

 

"You`re hurting me," Kylo breathes, eyes pleading.

 

Armitage freezes, releases his throat with quaking fingers as he studies the boy with horrified eyes. He doesn`t react as Kylo pulls him by the collar, crashing their mouths together into a scorching kiss. When he pulls away, awestruck, he looks at Kylo`s tented pants and hooded eyes.

 

"You liked it," he breathes, disbelieving "You`re enjoying yourself, you _degenerate_."

 

He can`t help but notice Kylo`s spit-slick pink lips, how pupils are blown with something dark and inviting.

 

"You need me," Kylo gulps, averting his eyes from Armitage, snaking his hands to encompass his waist "Play along with me, Mr.Hux."

 

Armitage pulls away from the heat of those large hands like they burned, the anger in his eyes residing but still there.

 

"Don`t talk to me like that," he says, wiping his mouth with his hand "You lied to me about your _age_."

 

"It doesn`t matter."

 

"What the hell is the matter with you?"

 

"It really doesn`t, _if_ nobody finds out," Kylo steps closer towards Armitage  "And no one will if you play along."

 

"What are you trying to say, Kylo?" He cautions, voice strained under the weight of understanding.

 

"What I`m saying is," Kylo leans into his ear "You need me more than I need you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Next update will come tomorrow or the day after that at most. As always, thank you for reading!


	8. Depression + Acceptance

Armitage didn`t grow in a happy family; He had never considered his mother a _bad_ woman, only weak-willed and stupid. She was beautiful, he remembered, her blue eyes kind and soft when she looked at him, an underlying sadness he`d never seen in anybody else. His father had been a violent man with alcoholic tendencies and steely eyes that always weighted Armitage down.

 

Those nights that his mother would retreat from her room crying to search the comfort of her teen son, she`d tell him what a sweet child he`d used to be. That he looked more and more like his Dad now that he was growing, that his eyes reflected the same muted anger that made Brendol so alluring and dangerous all the same. At the time he`d be nuzzled against his mother`s chest as if he was a toddler, he`d consume every little morsel of affection greedily, without saying a word, basking in the light of her warmth despite the insulting comparisons or the tears in her eyes.  

 

Ben Solo, in some aspects, reminds him of himself.

 

Right now it's Friday evening, Armitage is lying on his couch, arms crossed behind his head as he stares blankly at the ceiling. Only in the privacy of his home could he become as removed from reality as he was now.

 

"Friday after school," Kylo had said against his ear the last time they spoke "Your place."

 

He`d behaved remarkably normal after that, so much so that Armitage had to fight against the recurring fantasy that it had all been a dream. It was 8pm and Armitage felt mentally exhausted. If he had to describe what he was feeling it would be a mixture of impotence, anxiousness and anticipation. Once the truth about Kylo`s bogus back-story had sunken into him like an irremovable fact, his brain kept sending him mixed signals.

 

Armitage wasn`t the type of person to willingly engage with people, or one people were willing to engage themselves. His mother would`ve said that his pristine persona was to blame. His father would`ve pointed out how he was always asking questions he shouldn`t be, how he always seemed to be gathering information for motives unknown but mischievous and impure nonetheless, even if he was too much of a weakling to act upon them.

 

Today marked twelve years since the accident that had killed them both.  

 

The light knocking on his door snaps him out of his daydreaming. He briefly contemplates lying there, letting it go unanswered, but the array of possibility that arises in his brain makes him scrap the idea completely. When he opens the door the sweet smell of soap hits his nostrils before Kylo Ren comes into view.

 

"Hey," he says, standing awkwardly at his front door. Standing like that, he almost looks bashful. It is only now that Armitage realizes how grating the difference between Kylo´s many faces actually was "Can I come in?"

 

"Do I have a choice?" Armitage says drily, making way for the large boy that actually _laughs_ , chuckles like this was all some friendly banter instead of a hostage situation.

 

"You don`t," he answers lightheartedly, going straight to the refrigerator without Armitage`s blessing. He figures it really doesn`t matter anyway "How was work today?"

  
"I don`t want to talk to you about it," Armitage assures him as he sits on the couch. He sees the shiny golden can on Kylo`s hand  "Me infringing underage drinking laws was not part of our agreement."

 

Armitage wouldn`t say he`d consented to an agreement as much as he felt coerced into complying with this impulsive boy`s requests, all against his better judgment. Something told him it would be much easier to out himself to the authorities than to be subjugated like this, he was almost proud enough to actually do it. Almost.

 

Maybe he was just as spineless as his mother.

 

"Well, you`re not my dad," Kylo says simply, taking a seat next to him as he cracks the can open "Besides, our agreement is flexible because I`m a nice guy like that."

 

Armitage goes silent, trying to think of ways to stall or avoid the inevitable.

 

"What did you tell your mother?" he asks, feeling dirty as the words came out of his mouth and the face of Leia flashed in his mind`s eye.

 

"I sneaked out."

 

"Why are you like this?"

 

"Don`t worry about it, that`s my business to handle."  
  
"Your business!?" Armitage says disbelievingly. Doesn`t know why he`s surprised at this point.  "If things go south, you know it`s me who`s going to pay for it, right?"

 

"She`s not used to me being there so she won't notice I sneaked out," He turns his head with an irritated expression, the _brat_ "What`s with the cross-examination anyway?"  


"I need to know that you`re at least smart enough to know how to cover your tracks. I don`t particularly trust your decision making."

 

"Enough of that already," Kylo says suddenly, downing the entire beer in seconds, to Armitage`s surprise and horror "You should start touching me now."

 

Armitage lets out a huff of air through his nostrils, eyes closed "You can`t just expect me-"

 

"Oh, don`t do this," Kylo says, drawing his legs up on the couch, starts straddling the very stiff Armitage "We`ve been through it once before."  


"It was _different-_ "

  
"Was it though?" Kylo says, both hands snaking up Armitage`s clothed shoulders and up his neck, cups his jaw "I`m still the same person as before, you know."

 

" It was all under false pretense, I had no way of knowing you were tricking me into sleeping with an _undera-_ "

 

Kylo doesn`t let him finish, plants a soft kiss that is not corresponded "You should really stop talking now," He murmurs. He`s sunken lower into Armitage`s lap, resting much of his weight on his legs and crotch "Maybe you should close your eyes."

 

Armitage has started to pick up on the difference in the intonation of his voice, how it progressively starts getting huskier and softer, paradoxically, at the same time. He closes his eyes.

 

He feels Kylo`s hands snake through his hair, thumbs caressing his cheeks, then his ears. It`s difficult to ignore the heat of his body on top of him, his long, muscular legs rubbing against him as he starts to rock him into hardness. Armitage isn`t sure if he`s losing or winning, really, two parts of his mind warring silently within him.

 

"I can almost hear you thinking," Kylo says softly, mouth lingering just above the crook of his neck. "Just relax for me."

 

Armitage thinks about all the objectively bad decisions he`s made throughout his life and how none of them ever felt as illicit and exciting, or nerve-wracking and disastrous as this one.

 

"You`re hard," Kylo almost coos, draws in their mouths to a kiss that`s slow but heavy. This time, Armitage takes part in the courtship in a way it`s almost virginal in its hesitance but experienced in its dexterity. Kylo stops rocking himself "Is it bad that I want to suck you off now?"

 

"If we`re going to do it, just do it." Armitage remarks. He frowns as he feels Kylo stifling laughter.

 

"You`re really a special one, Mr.Hux."  


The phrasing hits a chord within Armitage  "I told you not to call me that." he mumbles instead.

 

"And I told you, you`re not in a position to argue." Kylo counters while he removes himself from on top of him, Armitage surprised at how much he missed the hot press of his body on him. He opens his eyes slowly when he feels Kylo getting on his knees.

 

"Nobody can find out," Armitage says, the telltale flush rising to his pale cheekbones as Kylo unfastens his pants "Promise me that."

 

His smile would be comforting if it didn`t betray ulterior intentions. " I promise."

 

Kylo pulls the dress pants to Armitage`s ankles, takes his clothed hardness into his hand with delicate fingers. Armitage can`t help his hands as they sneak up to cradle Kylo`s head. He always seemed to had a ritual when pleasuring Armitage this way; he nestled his faced against his member with care, hot breath moistening the fabric as Armitage pulled in a ragged breath trying to control himself. The gesture felt too intimate, almost.

 

It probably was.

 

When Kylo`s satisfied, he looks up at him with clouded eyes while he peels the boxer briefs with less patience than he did before. He plants a wet kiss on the head,  sending a shiver through Armitage's spine, then swallows it into his mouth unceremoniously. Armitage`s hands fasten tightly in his hair as he bobs his head in a slippery rhythm that denoted less skill than enthusiasm. He drags his tongue on the underside of his cock, small groans and self-satisfied moans coming from Kylo`s mouth and rocking through Armitage in a way he wouldn`t be able to admit later on.

 

"I`m close," Armitage confesses, ashamed of himself for being so weak "If you keep doing that…"

 

It`s the big brown eyes and the blown pupils that suddenly look at him from below, the lewd bulge in Kylo`s cheek as he stares at him that pushes him off the brink. He pulls achingly tight on Kylo`s scalp, a small gasp leaving his throat as he comes inside Kylo`s mouth, the engulfing heat slick and warm and oppressing. His breathing is agitated as he becomes boneless against his soft leather couch, Kylo removing himself from his softening cock.

 

"You look so hot when you cum, Mr.Hux." He breathes weakly, wiping the remainder spit and come from the side of his mouth. Armitage looks at him with heavy eyelids as he pulls him by the shirt onto him again.

 

There`s no finesse when he sticks his hand into the front of Kylo`s taught black pants, one, two, three tugs and the boy is coming into his underwear with a grunt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Next update like always will be up tomorrow or the day after that. Have a great weekend!


	9. Power Play Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up, there`s some aggressive, non-con elements in this chapter. I will be updating the tags just in case.

One of the most jarring things for Armitage was the guise of normality they had to maintain at school. Almost two weeks had passed since their "agreement" had gone into effect and a few things had become clearer.

 

Ben Solo and Kylo Ren were not, in essence, the same person.

 

As days bled into weeks, he`d notice how Ben Solo`s personality unfolded within the school environment, his soft but mysterious persona intriguing and attracting people almost inadvertently. From his position as a teacher, it was difficult to analyze how much of it was fabricated and how much was really, truly himself. To Armitage`s surprise, Ben Solo breezed through his assignments and quickly became first of the class. From what he could gather this pattern repeated itself in every course and if Armitage felt a small glimmer of pride, he snuffed it out before he himself could notice.

 

Every time he caught himself thinking about Ben Solo he`d hated himself for it; He dreaded not knowing what to think about the boy anymore.

 

"You`re looking stressed," Phasma says suddenly, breaking his concentration as she takes a seat next to him "Why haven`t you gone home yet?"

 

They`re in a mostly empty teacher`s room. Both of them have the last period of the day completely free and Armitage is catching up to some assignments he hadn`t had the chance to look over.

 

"I don`t want to take these home," he gestures at the pile of papers " I`ve been a little…occupied."

 

Phasma looks at him silently for a while and he knows what`s going to come out of her mouth before she says it "You`ve been pretty busy lately," she muses suggestively, her eyes set on him in a way he`d long gotten used to "I wonder what you`re getting up to…"

 

"You know that`s none of your business," he says lightly,"But you`re going to ask anyway."  
  
"I haven`t said anything!" she counters as if his interjection surprised or offended her "What _are_ you getting up to though?"

 

"I said it`s none of your business, didn`t I?" he responds dryly, turning the page.

 

"You`re seeing someone," she asserts. "I know you better than what you give me credit for."

 

"What are you talking about?"  


"I know about your little secret." she whispers suddenly, head getting closer to Armitage.

 

When she sees the terror in his eyes, she can`t contain the laughter that erupts "Oh my God, you should`ve seen your-" She stops talking, looking over his shoulder "Can I help you?"

 

Armitage turns around to look at a lost Ben Solo "Yes, I`m just looking for Headmistress Organa. She wasn`t in her office so I thought she may be here."  


"Well, you can`t enter here, it`s against the rules." Phasma chides.

 

"He`s her son." Armitage assures her, looking at him with impassive eyes.

 

"Oh, alright. I think she already left though," Phasma offers "Sorry, kid."

 

"It`s alright," He says primly "I`ll guess I`ll just walk home, then."

 

Armitage could swear something is not right as he turns around and leaves the room. Both Phasma and himself stare at him until he`s out of sight. Then Phasma looks at Armitage wordlessly.

 

"He`s in my class." He says, returning to his paperwork.

 

"He must really be a handful to work with."

 

"Well, he _is_ as bullheaded as his mother."

 

"Not because of that." Phasma dismisses quickly.

 

Armitage stares at her.

 

"You know something." It`s a statement that doesn`t betray the unhealthy curiosity he feels.  
  
"I wouldn`t say I _know_ anything," she begins "As far as gossip goes, though…"  
  
"Just spit it out." He demands impatiently.

 

"Only if you answer if you are seeing someone for real though."

 

Armitage weighs his options in his head.

 

"Something like that." He concedes.

 

"I knew it! You`re frowning way less than usual-"

 

"Just talk already."

 

"Damn, if you aren`t invested in gossip all of a sudden."

  
"He`s my student and Leia`s _son_ , of course I`m interested."

 

"Okay, okay. So, according to Linda…"

 

Armitage looks lost already.

  
"The secretary? The one with wavy brown hair- You know what, it really doesn`t matter. According to her," her tone barely above a whisper in the empty room "Leia`s son got expelled from his last school, private school mind you, due to  "inappropriate behavior"."

 

"What the hell does that mean?" he asks distractedly.

 

"Beats me, she wouldn’t tell me any more than that. But it got me thinking, you know; If he got expelled _,_ you`d think it was something really, really serious.

 

"Now, call me a conspiracy theorist, but you`d think a school so expensive would have to be upfront and detailed with the reason for expulsion."

  
"So what are you saying?" Armitage questions halfheartedly.

 

"Well, if you ask me then I would say it was something so compromising to the school`s reputation that they were unwilling to disclose the exact reason they removed Ben Solo off their honors roll and out of the school completely.

 

"In any case, you didn`t hear this from me."

 

xxx

 

Armitage gets home feeling uneasy. He knows it`s probably nothing, certainly nothing that should concern him, but that doesn`t stop him from rethinking every single interaction he`d ever had with Ben Solo since they`ve met. Something he had noticed since the beginning was how starved for affection he was, something he`d eventually attributed to his age. Armitage hadn`t allowed himself to think about it much more than what he`d already had, trying not to get invested in this strange boy that held his life in the palm of his hand.

 

Armitage hated feeling like he`d lost control of the situation, even if it was impossible to argue otherwise.

 

Two loud bangs on his door make him start "OPEN UP!" he hears an angry voice outside "I know you`re inside!"

 

He irritably swings his door open, revealing a furious Kylo "What the hell is your problem-"

 

He`s hauled inside by the front of his shirt before he can complete his sentence, Kylo kicking the door shut "Who was she?" he seethes "WHO WAS SHE!?"

 

"What are you talking about!?" Armitage splutters, fear painted into his features, hands trying to distance himself from Kylo. Armitage looks into his eyes but he almost can`t recognize him through the rage reflected there

"The woman you were with today, who was she?"

 

"What, Phasma?" he says incredulously. Kylo`s grip tightens as he draws closer to Armitage`s face.

 

"Are you fucking her?" he spits suddenly, Armitage is unsure of what`s happening but his anger is contagious.

 

"Maybe I am," He lies defensively, scared and furious "What is it to you?"

 

The only warning he gets is the blunt force of Kylo`s fist against his face as he tumbles to the ground with a grunt. Before he can stand up again, Kylo`s weight is already placed on him, red face partly obscured by long black strands of hair.

 

Armitage feels the mounting panic as he closes the distances between them and whispers in his ear "You`re mine," he says with a fierceness that terrifies him "You`re only mine." He repeats, suddenly biting his ear with little finesse. Armitage can`t stop the anxious whimper leaving his throat.

 

"What do you want from me?" he pleads instead, terrified by the looming figure gnawing at him like he wanted to consume him "I`ve done everything you`ve asked me, what more do you want from me?"

 

"Say you`re mine." Kylo growls, driving his hips down on Armitage.

 

"Please stop this." Armitage almost begs now, feeling his warm hands travel underneath his dress shirt without restraint.

               

"Say it." Kylo repeats, grinding his hardness against Armitage again.

 

"I`m yours," Armitage breathes as Kylo pinches one of his nipples "I`m yours, just stop this, please."

 

"You`re mine, only mine…"Kylo babbles, almost oblivious to what`s happening, rocking himself against Armitage with abandon now "Mine, mine, mine. Only mine…"  


He comes with a distressed sigh against Armitage`s wet neck.


	10. Power Play Part 2

They remain laying down, Armitage painfully aware of Kylo`s hot breaths against his skin, the way his weight is slumped on him, how his come and sweat are staining his clothes. He feels humiliated and dirty, unsure if he`s punch-drunk or disassociating when noticing the weird press of Kylo`s belt buckle and phone against his body.

 

"I love you," Kylo whispers suddenly, piercing Armitage`s train of thought with new waves of icy fear "I love you, I love you."

 

Kylo`s stuttering breaths come before the sobs and Armitage is at a loss.

 

"Don`t do this…" Armitage says softly as Kylo cries, tearful and pathetic against his shoulder. Armitage heaves them both upright, Kylo bracketing Armitage`s legs with his knees "Hey, come on…"

 

"I`m sorry," Kylo whimpers, thick spit darkening the fabric of Armitage shirt "I shouldn't have hit you, I`m sorry…"

 

Armitage knows none of this is right, not their relationship, not their discussions and certainly not Kylo Ren. Ben Solo. Whoever he was now, he wasn`t sure how to separate them anymore.

 

Armitage always thought that he would be different from his mother. He`d always criticized her for allowing his father to make their lives a living hell for believing in second chances and trust where trust should have never been given. As he holds the wailing boy in his arm, he wonders meekly if he`s destined to pick up broken pieces of other people`s lives until the day he dies.

 

He says nothing as he lifts them upright and guides him to his bathroom, doesn`t comment as Kylo wipes the slime off his nose and hiccups wrack through his body. He keeps silent as he eases Kylo out of his clothes slowly, not a word as Kylo looks at the pile of dirty laundry with lost eyes Armitage turns on the shower. When the water starts running warm, he speaks "I`ll give your clothes a wash. There are towels underneath the sink."

 

He picks up the heavy, soiled clothes carefully between his forefinger and thumb, closes the door with a dull thud and wonders.

 

His face is still sore from the blow he`d received, a brief glance at the bathroom mirror revealed the slight reddening and darkening of his left eye, so after starting the washing cycle, he gets the cautionary icepack he kept in his fridge. He sits once again on the couch as he stares aimlessly at the spot on the floor they were but minutes ago, wishes the stinging frostiness of the ice against his skull would transfer to his brain and mute the million words and ideas transmuting into bizarre shapes and sizes, confusing and overwhelming him.

 

Armitage doesn`t know how much time has passed when he hears Kylos voice, shy almost, out of the ajar bathroom door "I`m done…"

 

He knows it`ll take at least forty minutes until his clothes are done.

 

"There`s a spare white bathrobe next to the towels," he answers "Put that on until your clothes are off the wash."

 

The door clicks shut once, then open again as Kylo steps out of the cloud of vapor hesitantly. He joins an absentminded Armitage without a word.

 

"Did your mother ever told you she was my teacher at school?" Armitage muses suddenly "I hadn`t really noticed before, but I have the blurry recollection of her mentioning her toddler son once or twice in the classroom. She`d  talk about your chubby little cheeks and how uncontrollably energetic you were. I remember that."

 

Kylo shifts uncomfortably in his seat as the whirring noise of the washing machine fills the silence.

 

"Imagine my surprise when I returned here and found out she`d abandoned you halfway through the country to go live with your uncle."

 

The words sting as they leave his mouth, they sting when they enter Kylo`s eardrums and sinks into his brain.

 

"I wonder how much is her to blame for how you turned out." Armitage says curiously, no real bite in his words even though they`re hurtful.

 

"Do you want to know why I`m here? Why I`m back with my mother?" Kylo blurts out, almost as if his instinct of self-preservation and pride had hijacked his speech.

 

He takes Armitage`s silence as permission.

 

"My mother finds me crying one afternoon after school. I was probably five, six years old. She finds me crying because I`d just found out that _boys_ could not kiss other _boys_."

 

Armitage hums distractedly.

 

"Next thing I know, I`m being shipped to my uncle to " _grow up with a father figure_ ". Of course, I didn't know what that meant or why this is happening, I just know that one day I have a mother and all of a sudden I`m not with her anymore.

 

"Once I`m enrolled in Catholic school, I start understanding that there`s something fundamentally wrong with me. I`m an impure, sinful man with an abominable taste for men. I`m taught that I need to hide, which  I do. At least for a while, "

  
If Armitage has reservations towards Kylo`s apparent self-awareness, he shows nothing.

 

"Officially, I got expelled for vandalizing school property, which I did," he continues heavily "In reality, I got kicked off for being in a relationship with another guy in my class. Says he got cold feet and actually told his parents I had tainted him with my "homosexual inclinations", sparing him from any guilt and throwing me under the bus. Just when I thought I`d finally found some repose from hiding something I can`t control, my _boyfriend_ leaves me out to dry, just like that."

 

At this point, Hux is staring at him so attentively, it makes it difficult to finish talking. He still proceeds.

 

"And suddenly I`m back here and out of spite, I decide to fuck every man I can find. Until I find you. You look so much like him, Mr.Hux, I swear. I couldn`t resist it when I saw your pictures, I couldn`t believe it. I never had a chance of clearing things up with him either, they told my mother I needed to transfer to another school and I was gone as quickly as I came."

 

"So you coerced me into having sex with you while lying, knowing one hundred percent that you`d always have leverage over me in case I decided I didn`t want to become your personal fuck-doll?" Armitage grits out, an exhausted fury mounting the more he talked.

 

Kylo looks unapologetic as he nods.

 

"You being gay is not the problem," Armitage concludes, looks at him more intently than ever before "Your fucked up notions of what`s acceptable is."

 

"I want _you_ now," Kylo hastens fiercely, like there was nothing to learn from all of this "I feel that I need to have _you_."

 

"You`re fucked in the head," Armitage answers crassly, coldly "I want nothing to do with you."

 

"That is not up to you to decide." Kylo spits back, eyes starting to get wild.

  
  
"I`m done with this. I`m done with you, I`m done with us. Let`s end this now, for both of our sakes."

 

"That`s not up to  you to decide." Kylo repeats, voice strained under the anger he`s suppressing poorly.

 

"Doing this won't earn your mother`s love, won`t make the guy who betrayed your trust come back to your life," Armitage challenges, inching closer "I`ll only be a reminder of that person never loved you because I`ll _never_ love you."

 

"I`ll make you love me," Kylo snarls, drawing near to Armitage`s face like a rabid dog "You _will_ love me!"

 

"End this," Armitage continues "End this and forget about it and maybe, _maybe_ you can start forgiving yourself before you start perusing  anybody else."

Kylo`s about to throw himself onto of Armitage again until his eyes suddenly widen in terror.

 

"Mr.Hux," he whispers weakly, tapping gently all over the borrowed robe "Where`s my phone?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been an awesome run, this will most likely be the second to last chapter. I'll be updating soon as always. Thank you everybody for the kudos, comments and bookmarks. Maybe this will have a continuation one shot, depending on what you guys want.


	11. Two Sides

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the comments, subscriptions, kudos, and views. I`m so happy I got to write this story and people have been willing to participate in the process! Please read the end notes for more info on the story :) 
> 
> I hope you enjoy the last chapter!

Armitage soaks up the array of emotions twisting in Kylo`s face: Shock, anger, disbelief, denial.

 

"It`s where you left it." He answers simply, fully aware of the fact that it`s beyond salvation now. He`s half expecting Kylo to launch himself onto him like last time, only this time he feels a dizzying rush of power that makes him brave enough to consider standing his ground.

 

"They were in my pockets," Kylo whispers weakly, looking around the apartment as if Armitage could`ve even _thought_ of saving the vestiges of incriminating activities "But you knew that already."  
  
He`s angry, by _God_ if he isn`t positively foaming at the mouth. Armitage savors every bit of it, the twitching jaw, the darkened eyes. The slow burn of humiliation as he sits naked in a borrowed robe with Armitage, fully dressed, just looking at him.

 

It`s sublime.

 

"You`re disturbed," Armitage quips, couldn`t stop himself from gloating if only a bit "And now you have nothing on me."  


"Are you testing me, Armitage?" Kylo answers dangerously, fists so tight you`d think his arms were cramping up. The use of his first name doesn’t go unnoticed by Armitage either "I may have backed everything up-"

 

"You haven't, though, have you, Ben?" he interrupts "You`re too impulsive to do that. I don`t believe you`ve done that."

 

"I don`t need proof," Kylo runs on "If I just _say_ it happened, they`ll believe me-"  


"Maybe," Armitage concedes, feeling bold  " But giving my impeccable background and your erratic behavior I think that`s a risk I`m willing to take."

 

He`s fully aware he`s rubbing salt on the wound but he can`t stop himself, it`s so sweet. He leans in closer to Kylo`s ear now, almost salivating as he says "Nobody will ever believe-"

_  
TING!_

 

Kylo stands up like a lightning bolt, shattering the moment completely as he storms toward the washing machine and proceeds to give it a kick so powerful it rattles.

 

"HEY!" Armitage yells, startled as he runs and grabs Kylo from the back "Are you insane!?" he wrestles the bigger man farther away from his appliances. Water drips from Kylo`s hair have dampened the floor, Armitage realizes absently as he slips and both of them tumble to the floor.

 

The strength of the fall knocks the air out of Armitage`s lungs, the weight of the other splayed on top of him now. Kylo rolls over, bathrobe open and chest heaving as he inhales and exhales roughly. They stay on the floor longer than they probably should, Armitage attributing it to the dizziness that wouldn`t allow him to stand.

 

"You`ve really caught me now," Kylo says after a while, surprising Armitage in its refreshing honesty "I`ve got nothing."

 

He doesn`t answer back, angry about this afternoon, angry about the bruise on his face, angry that his fucking _washing machine_ couldn’t go unscathed.

 

Armitage felt so angry.

 

"Do you hate me, Mr.Hux?" Kylo asks now so softly, just like last time.

 

Armitage wants to cuss him out, wants to kick him in the ribs, wants to spit just how much he would enjoy seeing Kylo Ren _die_ just to begin to describe how much he hates him. For reasons he can`t fathom, all he can think of right now is the curve of Ben`s smile.

 

"You`re broken," Armitage says, unsure of why he`s willing to engage "You`re broken and I don`t know if anybody can fix you."

 

"Do you want to know what I think?" Kylo questions now, a tone so light and conversational it`s almost surreal.

 

_No._

 

He says nothing.

 

"I think I finally know what kind of person you are." Kylo muses, unbothered by the coolness of the tile floor against the back of his calves.

 

"You do?" Armitage offers, looking at his ceiling as he revels in the unspeakable absurdity of their situation.

 

"I think we`re more alike than you think, too."

 

"We`re not."  


"What would`ve you done in my position?" the question is sincere, the intent clear "Would you`ve given up the power I had so easily?"

 

"I wouldn’t have… I`d never…" Armitage fumbles with the words, unsure why he feels he`s been caught in a lie.

 

"You liked it," Kylo concludes, triumphant if it weren`t for the sad edge of his voice "I wouldn’t have pressed if I didn`t know you found solace in my presence."

 

"You don`t know me like that," Armitage clarifies. To whom, he does not know " You didn`t give me a choice."

 

"You loved every minute of it," Kylo lowers his voice as if sharing a secret "Because you and I are broken like that."

 

Armitage wants to argue but the frog in his throat won't let him.

 

"We crave love in ways that are not healthy. What I think, Mr.Hux," Kylo continues, voice a low grumble and Armitage can feel cold nimble fingers encompassing his outstretched palm "Is that maybe, this was much more enjoyable than you`d like to admit."

 

Armitage pulls his hand out of the other`s reach "You`re delusional."

  
"Maybe I am," Kylo concedes, closes the front of his robe as he stands up slowly "But you could`ve done this," he says motioning at the washing machine "A million times before. If you`d really wanted to. You could`ve begged…"

 

Armitage isn`t sure if he`s emotionally or physically exhausted, but he can`t react normally anymore.

  
"You could`ve asked. But you liked it, once you realized that I only wanted to please _you_. Only wanted to make _you_ feel satiated, special. Loved."

 

Armitage stands up, looking into the boy`s big brown eyes. He`d never really understood what their depth conveyed. They`re standing in front of each other now, both feeling the unfathomable barrage of emotions coming and going, unable to pinpoint what they felt.

 

"Let me kiss you," Kylo breathes, stepping closer "At least one last time."

 

Armitage says nothing when Kylo presses his soft lips against his own.    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying to convey the complexities of each character in a "what-if" scenario was really a challenge but I think they kinda took me to a natural progression of a story instead of vice-versa. It has been a nice experience, first time I`ve actually finished a multichapter story so I`m very happy with myself over this summertime project (it`s summer in the southern hemisphere). That being said, I wanted to say that I hope the story was legible at least since English is not my first language. I`m sorry for grammatical or structural errors, they are kind of difficult to catch with no beta.


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